my journey of life....

i always imagine my life is like i'm walking non stop on a never-ending road n path...on my journey...i fell...stumbled...and tripped a lot...n when the pain was no longer endurable... i cried..not knowing what to do...n hoped that crying can ease my pain..can make it go away...but still the marks is there..too deep to just vanished even though it had healed...n gathered my strength back to go on with my journey...i crawled...grab hold of anything near me so that i could stand...n walked again...n when my confidence is back...i tried to run...n then i stumbled again...bleeding...crying...then continued the journey...sometimes, i almost paralyzed...n thought that i can never walk again...that my journey will end...but i'm grateful...in spite of everything that i've been through...i still have the strength to go on with my journey without losing my rasional thinking and my senses....becoz i hav people around me...that always support me no matter what..n hold my hand to help me stand...n now...i fall again...excruciating pain like i've been stabbed even more...i cried...n begging for help at people around me...people that once helped me to stand up n walked again...but they just glare blankly at me..the only people that i can rely on n trust with all my heart...had turned their back on me...i'm so depressed n helpless knowing that i hav to stand up alone...like losing my wings that helped me to fly...i pray to God...to give me strength...n help me go through it...n make the journey easy for me...n now i realize...i can't rely on anybody....only God n myself...sometimes i hav to be stubborn...that way i can continue with my way n prepare for the next fall...so that i can bare the pain...

when i faced with all the difficulties that nearly choked me to death....i always thought...is it my fault??why i must faced with these difficulties all in a row??when all of these will end??and most of it..what's the silver lining behind it??

i always thought that i am emotionally strong...that people around me need my help to get through with their problems..i always lend my ears n gives my shoulder to cry on whenever they need me...n voice out opinions when they ask for...n strained my brain to think of the best solution for them...i always think that i can motivate people...i always think that people need me....but now...i am the one who need those shoulder to cry on...and i'm crawling..staggering with much difficulties...to go on with my life...n keep reminding myself that i'm fine on my own...dun worry...i'll manage......